May 10, 2012

Ny’s {Mother’s depression}

82 Comments

  • Dear Ny, reading your blog made me want to visit you and give you a huge hug. As you know I myself had a breakdown due to stress and depression. I couldn’t believe that a strong person like me could end up in such a state. Doc told me that strong people like me take far too much on our shoulders and when strong people go bang they do it big!!! 7 months on sick before I was well enough to be gently integrated back into work!!! I never thought it would happen to me.
    I was lucky. My children helped and supported me and fully understood why mum felt this way. My youngest son received councelling at school to help him understand why mum was so upset all the time, and unable to cope with “normal” every-day things. It got so bad at one stage I couldn’t leave the house!!! Panic attacks and hot sweats drove me back inside. But I am happy to say that I am well again. I still get a bit stressed at times, but now know how to deal with it. I know I am one of the lucky ones. I never wanted to die, self harm, or harm anyone else. Just wanted to cry and sleep, and hide away from the world. So I fully understand how people can just give in. Don’t give in – get help. My doc was marvelous. Hope to meet you one day – will probably drive your lovely daughter over to visit.
    Love Gail x x x

    • Not sure I would ever have recovered from the loss of a child the way you have, the miscarriages were traumatic enough. I have nothing but the greatest respect & admiration for people like yourself who continue to live with what is the most unnatural order of things & still go on to help their other children thrive. Feel like Ive known you for years even though weve never met & also hope to remedy that soon, love Ny.

  • I think we all had to deal with our mother’s issues as we got older and could handle it. I wrote about it the year I turned fifty, just to get it out of my system and not for anyone else. By doing it I released a lot of emotion and began to feel better about it all. It allowed me to forgive all the trauma and deal with the past a lot easier. Your sister. Linda

    • Theres no doubt that it is extremely therapeutic to write your thoughts down & make sense of them. I understand why Lewis promotes the idea & would encourage anyone to do the same even if you burn it straight away afterwards.We were the survivors & that has made us stronger. Love Ny.

    • - Courtney What a lovely weiddng and an incredible setting! How lucky are you to have such awesome clients to take you to amazing places!! I bet you had a BLAST!! The photos are beautiful, too, of course! Ok, enough with the !!!!! Sorry!

  • I will never get over losing my daughter Laura. People still tell me to remember the good times – of which there were plenty. But I feel cheated about the memories we would have had if she hadn’t died so young. I would have loved her to have her 21st birthday, engagement party, wedding and birth of my first grandchild – but it wasn’t to be. 20 is no age to fall asleep and never wake up. I have had to learn to live with it. but will love and miss her till the day I die. Having 3 other beautiful children helped. I had 4 lovely children, and will always be a mum of 4. Three are fortunately still with me, and my first-born will always be in my heart.
    You are right, we have never met Ny, but Bel said we are so alike, and I look forward to meeting you too. Have suggested to Bel that we have a girly day out in Luton soon x x x x

    • Loved the posts on Dave Smalley all this week. Awesome. I’ve gone ahead and linked to them from the Down By Law web site. Hope you don’t mind.

  • Just thought I would let you know how I know Lewis. He went to school with my daughter Amie and they have always been really good friends. He was always round my house from about the age of 5 lol, I also know his lovely mum Julie very well. I am very proud of Lew for setting up Mindz Matter after he had a terrible accident. He has us all very worried whilst he was in hospital after a serious head injury. Thank God he recovered. He worked really hard and I congratulate him. He has grown up into a lovely young man – who still makes me laugh with his daft sense of humour. Keep up the good work Lew – we love you babes x x x x

  • Aw Gail your so so strong and an inspiration, not only to your family but us outsiders!!! Lewis keep up all the hard work your doing amazing things and helping hundreds of people lets hope you carry on spreading the word and genuinely helping people live with their mental health problems! Thanku

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